David Earl Johnson, LICSW

2 minute read

Abuse in relationships is way too common, often because we are not taught when we are young to identify relationships going awry. If you are in a relationship that sounds like this, consider the wisdom of continuing. [The Sacramento Bee][1]

He wants to spend an excessive amount of time alone with you and he encourages you to flake on your friends, ditch school or skip practice. It can seem like a romantic gesture, but it’s not. One partner’s insistence on being the sole focus of the other’s time and attention is a key warning sign of abuse, as the victim is slowly isolated from family, friends and favorite activities, experts say. He scrutinizes every detail of your life, including your friends, your hangouts and even your wardrobe. His controlling attitude means your cell phone is constantly in use, since he’s always checking up on you. “In the early stages it gets misread as, ‘Well, gosh, they care about me so much, they care about every little thing I’m doing,’ ” says Linda Hoos, an attorney for Break the Cycle. But it’s not a measure of his affection, Hoos says, it’s a way to assert his control. Even if you’ve never so much as flirted with another guy since you started dating, he’s always accusing you of cheating. [More here.][2]

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